Or, what I've been doing for the past three days. (EN: ^Not really. Schedules are great)
Put this in before I get to sleep. (EN: We really do need some.)
Yes, I see the posts. No, I don't remember making them. Or the comment for that matter.
We'll see how sleeping goes. (EN: I'll be fine, don't worry)
The important bit, is I'm hanging out in Texas. I don't think I'm a fan, sorry.
The story starts with me driving to a little cabin in the middle of nowhere, in the woods in Montana. Now, here's the best part. Of course I'm already in the woods. The sun is starting to go down and I happen upon this little cabin that could have walked right out of Evil Dead, windows borded over, operator symbols all over the damn place.
I really hate those things.
But this is where the people I'm fetching are supposed to be. You hear about siblings, or couples running, but this? A family of runners? I don't believe it. There's a broke down looking minivan in the drive. That explains why they need the help.
"Hello the house! Anyone inside?"
"Who is this?"
"Your chauffeur Mr. Johnson. I'm an acquaintance of Elaine's." (EN:Not that I've actually met the woman. We just happen to have friends in common.)
"What's your name." (EN: Paranoia! This is honestly quite uplifting.)
"I call me Nemo, I suppose you could too?"
"Nemo. Alright." The door opens, there's a guy on the other side with a shotgun. Yep. I'm in America. (EN: Says the hypocrite with the revolver in his pocket at this point)
"Only two kinds of paranoia," quoth me as I step through the door. "Where do you need a hand?"
The woods are already making me edgy and I don't like all those operator symbols. They're worrying me. He locks the door behind us and says "Over this way." There's a blonde woman and a little girl who, if you'll believe it walks over and hugs me.
"Are you Nemo? You're going to take us someplace safe, right?"
There's a brief discussion and now really isn't the time for hugs. Don't get me wrong. Kids are great. (EN: I love children. But I could never eat a whole one)
We start grabbing bags and moving them out to the van. I step out the front door. And BANG. Guess who's standing on the other side of the road. Fucking operator symbols. (EN: They're really not a good idea)
"Everyone, in the van now."
Needless to say we got the hell out of there pretty fast. Though I'll admit, having Ride of the Valkyries queued up beforehand made it a little comical.
So that's the Johnsons, Jen, Levi and little Emily, and me at Elaine's now. Apparently there's been quite an influx. We didn't really stop driving at all. And I haven't slept.